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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

50 things people have done that have annoyed me since Sunday




1) Some people have no concept of walking in a straight line. This is exceptionally annoying when they cross in a diagonal right in front of your straight and honest path on a zebra crossing, causing you to stop in your tracks and in the tracks of the waiting cars. Morons. Have you not even started to evolve?
2) Sneezing without covering their faces with their hands.
3) A man coughed on the train, I kid you not, evidently coughed some gloob into his hand, looked at it and licked his palm. LICKED HIS PALM. People are animals.
4) Why do people think it is okay to stop right in front of you in the middle of the pavement?
5) People who do not know how to walk up stairs. Getting the lift to go one floor just to heat their lunch up. They are not ill, disabled or pregnant. I know this because I know them. They are simply lazy.
6) There is a lady (for want of a better word) who works on the 5th floor in the FT building who does not know how to flush the chain. She always takes the biggest cubicle – meant for the disabled, by the way – and proceeds to do a poo. She then leaves all her poo there for other people to flush. This would not be so bad but she only does this when she is on her period. Therefore she leaves poo and blood and smears of bloody-poo stained toilet roll all over the toilet bowl. This woman is an animal and if I find out who it is I will literally drag her back into the cubicle and make her flush the chain. She is a cretin whose parents left her to be dragged up by wolves. She is a disgusting, abominable creature and I will find out who this vile piece of what should be humanity actually is. She will learn to flush, even if it costs me my job.
7) That’s it, actually. Only six things have annoyed me over the past two days.